


Lights

by AutisticWriter



Series: Tumblr Prompt Fills [11]
Category: The Fast Show
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Christmas, Epic Fail, Established Relationship, Fluff, Friendship, Hugs, Kissing, M/M, Swearing, Tumblr Prompt, Winter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-02
Updated: 2017-03-02
Packaged: 2018-09-27 21:37:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,702
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10052159
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AutisticWriter/pseuds/AutisticWriter
Summary: Person A is on the roof hanging up Christmas lights. Their ladder falls down and they’re stuck. Person B goes to help, but through clumsiness and dumb luck they manage to get stuck up there as well.





	

Ralph was torn away from his book when he heard a loud clattering thud from outside. It was followed a second later by Ted faintly but clearly yelling, “Fecking hell!”

He may have just been being paranoid, but Ralph’s brain had a habit of jumping to the worst case scenario. So he couldn’t help but feel his chest tighten as he wondered what might have happened to Ted. What if he’d fallen off of the roof? What if he was hurt?

His heart racing, Ralph threw his book down and rushed out of the back door, not stopping to put on his coat. It was freezing outside, the cold air biting his cheeks and nose, but he didn’t care. Ralph hurried around the outside of the house until he reached the front, where Ted had been putting the Christmas lights up.

The ladder was lying on the frosty paving slabs. Confused, Ralph looked up and saw something that made him want to laugh with pure relief. Ted was sat on the roof, his feet resting on the guttering, staring down at the ladder. In the surprisingly bright moonlight, Ralph could clearly see a mixture of irritation and stress on Ted’s face.

“Ted!”Ralph called, watching Ted’s face soften into a relieved smile when he realised he was there. “Are you all right?”

“I’m fine, sir,” Ted said, his slip up instantly telling Ralph that he wasn’t actually fine; Ted only ever accidently called him ‘sir’ when he was very tired or stressed. But he didn’t mention any of this, knowing it wasn’t really important. “I just knocked the bleeding ladder over.”

The breeze picked up and Ralph shivered, remember just how cold it was. They were even forecasting snow on the news. He folded his arms across his chest, tucking his freezing fingers into his armpits before they went numb.

“Yes, I noticed that,” Ralph said, his neck starting to hurt from looking upwards. “But... are you all right? I mean, you’re not hurt or anything, are you?”

“No, I’m fine,” Ted said, obviously realising that Ralph was worrying about him. “Just a bit annoyed. Hand me the ladder, will you, Ralph?”

“Yes, of course, Ted,” he said.

Still shivering, Ralph bent down and picked up the surprisingly heavy ladder. Carefully, he straightened up and moved it so it was leaning against the side of the house. He glanced up at Ted, and then started to climb up the not-very-stable ladder. He heard the tail end of Ted saying something, and looked up at him.

“What did you say, Ted?” he said, his stomach lurching as the ladder swayed slightly.

“I was just saying I’d come down to you, but...”

“Ah, I see what you mean,” Ralph said, wanting to kick himself for being stupid.

“Never mind. Just come on up,” Ted said, smiling. “You can give me a hand.”

Smiling at his partner, Ralph made his way up the ladder, noting that the Christmas lights appeared to be all up; Ted must have finished just before he knocked the ladder over. Once he was at the top, let Ted grasp his arms and help him onto the roof. Wobbling precariously, Ralph shuffled so he was sat on the damp tiles, and sighed, his breath visible in the cold air.

“Thanks,” he said, slightly out of breath.

“No problem,” Ted said, his voice soft.

Even though it was freezing cold and Ralph wasn’t that keen on heights, he had to admit that it was quite nice up here. He could see the entire grounds, including the big house and the stables, and the clear sky meant there were many constellations on display. Ralph turned his head and looked at Ted; his partner saw him looking and smiled fondly, putting his arm around his shoulders. Ralph leaned against Ted, feeling peaceful despite the freezing breeze rustling through his hair...

But then his foot slipped off of the frost covered gutter, banging against the top of the ladder. The ladder wobbled, before falling and hitting the ground with a familiar clattering thud. Ralph tensed up, flinching at the sound.

With a level of apprehension, Ralph glanced at Ted. Despite knowing that his partner was easily the kindest person he knew, part of Ralph expected Ted to get angry. But then he saw Ted was smiling, and he remembered that Ted wasn’t anything like his family.

“Oops,” he whispered, forcing himself to smile.

“Oops indeed,” Ted said, chuckling as he took Ralph’s hand in his own. “What is it about this fecking ladder? All it does is fall over!”

Ted’s laughter was infectious, and Ralph started to giggle too, until they were both spluttering with laughter. And this was exactly why Ralph loved Ted, because he somehow managed to make getting trapped on the roof in freezing weather fun.

\---

“You’re what?”

Ted sighed. “We’re stuck on the roof, Simon. How many more times?”

“Sorry, sorry,” Simon said. “But how’d that happen?”

“We knocked the ladder over,” Ted said. He glanced at Ralph, who, obviously grateful that he was sharing the blame for what had happened, gave him a sweet smile. “And before you ask, we were putting the Christmas lights up.”

“I see...” Simon said. “So, d’you want us to lend a hand?”

“Well that is kind of why I phoned, yes,” Ted said, raising his eyebrows; beside him, Ralph chuckled.

“Do I need to bring anything?” Simon asked.

“Don’t think so. I just need you to pick up the ladder and move it so we can get down.”

“Righto. We can do that,” Simon said, and Ted knew he was smiling. “See you in ten, Ted.”

“Thanks, mate. Bye.”

“Bye.”

Simon hung up, and Ted shoved his mobile phone back into his pocket. Even though he never really felt the cold, his fingers were a little numb, and they fumbled as he rammed the clunky mobile phone into his pocket.

Seeing Ralph looking at him, Ted said, “He said he’ll be here in about ten minutes.”

Ralph smiled, his cheeks bright red with cold. “That’s good. Um... I really am sorry about the ladder, Ted.”

Ralph looked a bit worried again. Sighing, Ted put his arm around his partner’s shoulders and pulled him close. Ralph was freezing, shivering in just his blazer, and Ted hoped his body heat would warm him up a bit.

“I know, but you don’t need to be sorry. It was an accident. And the fecking thing fell over for me too; it’s probably just got the hump with us.”

Ralph raised his eyebrows, a genuine smile crossing his face this time.

“The ladder’s got the hump with us?” he repeated, starting to laugh.

“Yeah, probably,” Ted said, knowing exactly how random his suggestion had been. But it was making Ralph laugh, and that was exactly what he had been planning. He hated how apologetic his partner was; it made him feel awful to think about how it most likely stemmed from his parents and his peers treating him badly when he was growing up.

So distracting Ralph when he started to worry and apologise was Ted’s main technique, and, as Ralph laughed and Ted joined in, he knew it was a rather effective one. At least, he hoped it was.

\--

Simon might have been an annoying git, but he was true to his word. Only ten minutes after their phone conversation, he and Bill arrived at the cottage. After they came through the gate, they stopped and stared up at Ted and Ralph. And then they burst out laughing.

Ted glared at them. “Are you going to help us, or just laugh?”

“Just laugh,” Bill said.

“Don’t feck about,” Ted said. “We’re bloody freezing.”

“All right, all right, keep your hair on,” Simon said, his eyebrows raised.

Ted stuck his middle finger up at him, and Ralph chuckled. He was shivering even more violently now, his teeth chattering loud enough that Ted could hear. Ted had tried to offer Ralph his coat, but Ralph wouldn’t take it.

Bill picked up the ladder, and, just as Ralph had done, leaned it against the side of the house. He stayed on the ground and held onto the ladder, and looked up at them.

“Coming down, then?”

“Give us a chance,” Ted said, but he smiled gratefully.

He helped an unsteady Ralph onto the ladder first, and then, grabbing his tool kit, followed Ralph down the ladder. He looked up at the lights; they all seemed to be in the right place, and hopefully would look great when he switched them on.

“Thank you for the help,” Ralph said to Simon and Bill. He looked a bit wobbly, and Ted put his arm around his freezing cold partner.

“No problem. Is that all then, mate?” Simon said, turning to Ted.

“Hang on a sec,” Ted said, letting go of Ralph and rushing into the house.

He ran into the hallway and flicked the switch labelled ‘XMAS’. Hoping it had worked, he went back outside and had a look, stopping on the way to grab a fleecy blanket out of the cupboard.

To Ted’s relief, he saw that the Christmas lights were working. They may have only been small lights, but the way they flickered in the darkness was rather mesmerising. Ralph, Simon and Bill were staring up at the lights, the red and green light dancing across their faces.

Ted went up to Ralph and wrapped the blanket around his shoulders. And then he leaned close to his ear and said, “What d’you think?”

“They’re beautiful, Ted,” Ralph whispered, grasping his hand and interlocking their freezing fingers.

“Beautiful enough to justify being trapped on the roof?” Bill said, grinning.

Ted flipped him the bird, but he was smiling too.

“Yes, definitely,” Ralph said, ignoring the sarcasm in Bill’s comment. Ted knew how much Ralph loved Christmas lights.

Ralph hugged him, wrapping his arms around Ted and squeezing him tightly, and Ted heard him sigh contentedly. Rubbing his partner’s back, Ted watched his friends smile fondly; for all they picked on Ralph for loving him, Ted knew they really supported their relationship.

“Merry Christmas, Ted,” Ralph said, and he gave him a kiss.


End file.
